I am grateful I have a job that allows me to work mostly from home, but the weather often prevents me from gardening adventures and outdoor chores. I realise some of you lovely readers will live in sunnier places, but it is usually cold and very wet here in the uk.
But today is sunny. Hooray! So, working from home today allows me to occasionally step outside and get that vitamin D shot and muddy hands as I relish a little planting and weeding.
I have been in the limelight lately, with invites for interviews and talks about my career in painting, and it's all a bit overwhelming for this shy lady. I am trying to celebrate my maturity; however, I sometimes have to work hard to embrace ageing, and looking back on one's career reminds me of time passing all too quickly. (talk link below)
You may have realised from previous blogs that I have imposter syndrome. This constant hindrance and stops me from saying yes to exciting steps forward.
It is a silly thing, but there it is, constantly telling me to run for the hills.
My son's sweet girlfriend wrote a poem for me to help with my silly imposter syndrome,
She has permitted me to share it with you, and I hope you find it helpful (just in case you have self-worries, too ;).
When dull clouds emerge
like bruises on skin,
and the harshness of winter
conjures darkness within.
Could you slowly remember
like revealing a dream,
that all that you are,
is all that you need.
The light that is missing
to others is known,
for it's something you share
and something you own.
It's a piece of the sun
though sometimes it hides,
it will rise in your chest
and set in your mind.
This light that you hold
shines bright all year round,
so remember to care
for the person it's bound.
by LC
What a sweetheart! I am blessed to have such lovely people in my life. We all have feelings of insecurity now and then; it is part of the human condition.
Keep looking to the sky and enjoy the light wherever it shines—the twinkle of light in a child's eye, the twinkle in your pet's eyes, or the soft rising or setting sun through the branches of the trees.
All twinkly moments are to be cherished.
So, without further ado, I will dedicate this blog to affirmation and ambition.
Not mine .... Yours
When I'm looking at my students' work on the forum of my online botanical school, I often read comments like, 'This isn't very good, but I tried' or similar words.
This statement is contradictory because 'I'm trying' is practising, and practising is the most wonderful affirmative thing you can do. Yet, we're all guilty of prefixing what we do with 'This isn't very good' or 'This is just,' which is so self-deprecating.
And, of course, this is only our opinion of our work, without knowing the opinion of others.
I think by saying 'this isn't very good', we are protecting ourselves in advance from any negative comments (which, I must say, never happens on my forum, as we are all there to pull each other up). When I read a students 'this is just' sentence, I immediately want to hold their hand and say this is good and brave, and practice is the only way to improve.
Even if we were born brilliant, we would still need to practice to maintain our brilliance.
Practice
I started in the morning,
I didn’t master anything
I continued in the afternoon
I called it practising.
By teatime, I was tired
So I had a cup of tea,
And then returned to practice
Belligerent I be!
Repeat, repeat, repeat
I went on into the night,
I think I forgot to sleep
But the morning made things right.
I spent so many days
Practising my thing,
I can see that I’m improving
as my skill is flourishing.
By billy
Some of us may be shy perhaps because of criticisms or setbacks that have bruised us in the past. But I am here to say (as in the movie) 'Let it go' 'Let it go'
When it comes to painting, sewing, cycling, or whatever your hobby is, it is your time to be completely in the moment. Although we look to others to affirm whether we are good at it or not, it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks; it is our time, it is our creativity. And I think we all know, deep down, how much we have to do to achieve the standard that we are aiming for.
One thing I am always doing, is trying to improve, even at this time in my career, I am still always striving to improve; I will always be trying. (at least that's what my husband says ;).)
The photographer I work with to create my painting tutorials asked me the other day,
"Do you paint for yourself anymore, or is it just for the teaching?" And do you still like painting after all this time?
At first, I thought this was a silly question, but then I do know some artısts who just work at their art for a job and not for the love of it, so my answer was-
'Of course, I paint for myself; I will always paint, for as long as I can; without painting, I don't know what my hands would do. I will always be trying to improve'.
So if you are one of those people who introduces their work as 'this is just' or 'this isn't very' or 'this is rubbish,' Then Stop.
Embrace the mode of practice
Embrace the mode of improving oneself
Embrace the journey and forget the destination, as I believe in art; you never really get there. There will always be more to learn and more to discover.
In my new book, which I am writing (with Search Press—out 2026), I hope to analyse composition and help others be more creative in composing their work, notice their strengths, and allowing themselves to play with compositional layout.
I mention this because I've spoken to a few people lately who have applied to an exhibition and have had their work rejected. They have worried that their work is not exciting enough or beautiful enough, or in some cases precise enough.This is highly deflating for an artist and can't put you off trying again. But one of my suggestions is to go along to the show anyway, make it a learning trip, take a little notebook with you, and do the following -
Jot down the things that have impressed you about the work in the show
Make a note of compositions that catch your eye (not to copy, just to inspire you on how far you can push the boundaries)
Make a note of the framing styles and the mount colour and thickness and of course the price of the paintings
Finally, look at the details and the style of the paintings.
Ask yourself, is this show suitable for your work as it is at the moment?
If it isn't, then maybe another show would be better suited to your work
OR this show could be the catalyst to inspire you to practice like the wind.
Try not to think, 'I could never do this.' Instead, think, 'How can I do this?' and 'How can I make this happen?'
With practice, the right tools, and a good mentor/tutor, not forgetting passion and practice, you will achieve, whatever your goal.
Notes from the painting table
I have been working on finishing a Daylily study that I was teaching at West Dean in London a few weeks ago.
Here it is and here's one of the little films I made once I was back in the studio.
Ps I will be teaching a 3 day class at West Dean in London Bloomsbury at the end of August 2025.
Ps Here is the link to my Jacksons Art Interview if you fancy a watch.
PPS the Big SBA 40th anniversary show is on at the Mall Galleries this June-
here's the blurb -
"Plantae 2025 is to be a great show; our 40th anniversary and Ruby celebration year, which will be held at the Mall Galleries from 26 May to 8 June 2025. We will have all three galleries and a longer period of two weeks, as well as some special prizes."
I will say a lovely, jolly farewell till April, and encourage you to pick up your brush and start to paint yourself happy. And if for some horrid reason you can't then I will try and paint for you and send you happy painting vibes, afterall you are the wind beneath my wings.
Peace, gentle rain, sunshine and a decent hug to you all
Billy xxx
don't forget to comment below, so I know I'm not just talking to myself again :)
Finally a 'Spot the nose competition'
(no prize, just the joy at looking at my very pretty Whippet, well maybe not at this angle)
